I know that I shouldn’t care what other people think. I truly admire those who can honestly say that they don’t. I consume myself with worry; worry that I’ve hurt someone’s feelings, worry that people don’t like me or think badly of me, and worry if what I may or may not say might conflict with someone. How silly! And what a waste of time!! I do not believe it makes me weak to care about what others feel or think but it is useless to assume three things: 1. That everyone I meet will like me or see me for who I am. I am a good person (with flaws) and if someone or anyone can’t see that, than they might need a place in my life. They definitely don’t deserve space in my head. 2. Its useless to assume that I can make everyone around me happy. Its not possible. There will even be people who decide to dislike me and everything I do for no reason. Why waste my time changing their mind. 3. It’s useless to assume that I can teach and raise my children in confidence when they see their mother so worried and concerned with everyone around her. I want to teach my children confidence. I want them to be humble and admit when they are wrong, but not to please other people.
I have been praying faithfully and digging really deep into my bible and I’ve found a few interesting things on this topic.
Ps. 19:14 says, “Let my words and thoughts be pleasing to you, Lord.”
It doesn’t say let my words and thoughts be pleasing to everyone around me.
Proverbs 4:23 says, “ Above ALL else, guard your heart.”
It is not anyone else’s job to worry about my heart; its mine. Therefore, spending my days worrying about what others feel about ME is completely wasting my day and energy when it could be placed elsewhere!
1 Corinthians 4:3 says, “I care very little if I am judged by you or by any human court; indeed, I do not even judge myself. “
God is the ONLY one to judge me. If Sally, Joe, Peter, and Kelly do not like me or judge me, I do not believe that God is going to keep me from paradise. I KNOW that their acceptance of me is not my key into heaven.
I have ONE life and I am here to live for my Savior. I am here to love and honor him. He instructs me to love everyone- not surround myself with hateful people. He instructs me to guard my heart- not let silly, petty, hurtful things get to me. And he instructs me to forgive…so that I can be forgiven. No where does it say, “make everyone else around you happy at the expense of your joy.” No, the bible says that in James 1:2-4, Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
So, I might be lacking in peoples approval and I might be lacking in a huge social acceptance or attention, but I do not need peoples approval to tell me who I am. People care so much (I know I’m not alone in this) and they let their self worth be judged by how many people they are surrounded by. Proverbs 18:24 says that, “A man with too many friends comes to ruin. But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”
I am a stay-at-home mommy who gets to love and spend all day with her children. I am a loving wife who is devoted to her husband and home. I am a Friend. A daughter. A sister. And I am dearly loved by my God. What anyone else thinks or feels about me is irrelevant.
I believe that I will forever be cautious of others feelings. If I feel that I offended or hurt someone, I will be quick to apologize and ask for forgiveness. But this weak and worry wart me, is gone.